On April 7, 2023, NF will return with the formal release of his fifth album, Hope. The American rapper entered a new chapter of his life, and a new optimism now dominates most of his thoughts, as we previously noticed by examining the title track. The album’s lead hit, Happy, makes it clear that the old demons have not yet been vanquished. Let’s examine the song’s meaning; the full lyrics are provided at the end of this article.
Happy: the song lyrics and their meaning
Happy is an intense song about how used we are to live in sadness, so much so that when we feel happiness, we don’t feel comfortable with this sensation.
The opening line of Happy is NF’s apology to God for his incapacity to enjoy and appreciate life. NF portrays his melancholy feelings in an intriguing way, to the point where he feels guilty for his relationship with misery.
Dear God, please
Hear me out, I know it’s been a couple years
Since I’ve reached
Out and said hello, I bet You’re wondering
Why I keep
Obsessing on and stressing all the little things
When I should be
Living life and soaking up the memories
Agony is mentioned in the chorus, implying that NF is in pain, which is made very clear in Happy’s lyrics. But ever since, that has been his only identity. And even though NF is aware that he needs to focus on enjoying life and showing gratitude for what he has, the truth is that if he were happy, he wouldn’t even recognize himself.
Living in my agony
Watching my self-esteem go up in flames, acting like I don’t
Care what anyone else thinks
When I know truthfully that that’s the furthest thing from how I
Feel, but I’m too proud to open up and ask ya
To pick me up and pull me out this hole I’m trapped in
The truth is I need help, but I just can’t imagine (Who)
Who I’d be if I was happy
Because of this kind of thinking, NF is aware that he needs assistance but is also certain that he will never ask for it. A part of you understands the way to really experience happiness, but it will involve a rebirth process, becoming someone else, and appreciating life in a whole different way. It’s like having constant opposition inside of you. And that’s unsettling because you’ve known who you are for years. Several uncertainties arise when you suddenly find yourself in a different future. What would you do if you had learned how to endure on the path of melancholy from your experience? Happiness can still push you outside of your comfort zone.
I’ll be the first to admit that I’m a lonely soul
And the last to admit I need a hand to hold
Losing hope, heading down a dangerous road
Strange, I know, but I feel most at home when I’m
Living in my agony
Since my life has been so difficult for such a long time, I no longer feel comfortable in happiness. This is the true meaning of the lyrics in Happy. It’s a paradox, because being depressed makes me feel myself above anything else.
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NF, Happy – The complete lyrics
Dear God, please
Hear me out, I know it’s been a couple years
Since I’ve reached
Out and said hello, I bet You’re wondering
Why I keep
Obsessing on and stressing all the little things
When I should be
Living life and soaking up the memories
I know I’ve been selfish, I have no excuse to give You, it’s true
Hanging by a thread’s how I live
I don’t know why, but I feel more comfortable
Living in my agony
Watching my self-esteem go up in flames, acting like I don’t
Care what anyone else thinks
When I know truthfully that that’s the furthest thing from how I
Feel, but I’m too proud to open up and ask ya
To pick me up and pull me out this hole I’m trapped in
The truth is I need help, but I just can’t imagine (Who)
Who I’d be if I was happy
Yeah, been this way so long, it feels like something’s off when I’m not depressed
I got some issues that I won’t address
I got some baggage I ain’t opened yet
I got some demons I should put to rest
I got some traumas that I can’t forget
I got some phone calls I’ve been avoiding
Some family members I don’t really connect with
Some things I said, I wish I woulda not let slip
Some hurtful words that never shoulda left my lips
Some bridges burned I’m not ready to rebuild yet
Some insecurities I haven’t dealt with, yes
I’ll be the first to admit that I’m a lonely soul
And the last to admit I need a hand to hold
Losing hope, heading down a dangerous road
Strange, I know, but I feel most at home when I’m
Living in my agony
Watching my self-esteem go up in flames, acting like I don’t
Care what anyone else thinks
When I know truthfully that that’s the furthest thing from how I
Feel, but I’m too proud to open up and ask ya
To pick me up and pull me out this hole I’m trapped in
The truth is I need help, but I just can’t imagine (Who)
Who I’d be if I was happy
Don’t know what’s around the bend
Don’t know what my future is
But I can’t keep on living in—
Living in my agony
Watching my self-esteem go up in flames, acting like I don’t
Care what anyone else thinks
When I know truthfully that that’s the furthest thing from how I
Feel, but I’m too proud to open up and ask ya
To pick me up and pull me out this hole I’m trapped in
The truth is I need help, but I just can’t imagine (Who)
Who I’d be if I was happy